Coffee and Collagen

Please note, the date of this missive was February 28, 2007

In a world of dry skin, how can a "Cup of Joe" help your target demographic?

I was speaking with a close associate the other day about our vending machines with patented CoollMisst^TM technology, and he commented that no one in the Northeast or Midwest would want a cooling mist at this time of year. After careful thought, I decided he is most likely correct in this observation.
Still, we here at Jay Standish, Inc. LLC are nothing if not resourceful, creative, and thoughtful. Thus was born the Next Big Thing^SM in the marketing communications industry.
As many of us are painfully aware, during the "heating" season, the air in our homes, offices, and public transportation tends to become extremely dry (and drying!) - producing a surfeit of static electricity (I've mentioned to my partner, Pat, the at-time-humorous effect of static electricity and man-made fibers) and of dry, itching skin.
"How," I hear many of you ask, "can a beverage vending machine help in this, and how can that helping be of use to me in my marketing communications?" That is precisely the question which you should be asking, and I'm pleased to know that many of you are doing just that.
Clearly, spraying a cooling mist at people who are already cold is not something to be considered a "wise" idea - but what if we were to emulate a spa, and lavish a bit of moisture upon the customer? We could take him (or her!) from looking like a refugee from a Van de Graaf generator, to a perfectly coiffed, well dressed consumer in no time. In fact, we might be able to alleviate some of the "itching" of his (or her!) skin as well, simply by "enhancing" the water in the misting reservoir with a bit of emollients or other moisturizing ingredients.
Still, we here at Jay Standish, Inc. LLC wonder if a cold soda and a moisturizer are the ideal combination. Accordingly, we are hard at work on a hot beverage dispensing vending machine with patent-pending MoistureMist^TM technology. Now, as our target audience is watching the full-motion video on the front of the machine, he (or she!) will be enveloped in a soft cloud of moisturizing vapors, enhanced by the aroma of freshly brewing coffee (or tea!).
What better way to tell your target demographic that you wish them well than to make their skin softer, with fewer cracks and rough spots, while ending the "frizzies" (remember those TV commercials about frizzies?) and providing a warm, comforting message, all in the context of receiving a warm, comforting beverage?
What better way indeed?
As noted above, the patent on our MoistureMist^TM technology is still pending, and we continue our developmental work - the coffee and tea vending machines occasionally play the videos in a somewhat jittery manner, apparently running just slightly faster than standard. We at Jay Standish, Inc. LLC are working on isolating the cause, and will put the machines out for bids in the near future.
Stay tuned for more!

Excelsior!

Last week, Jay wrote about a couple words which we had thought were gone from the marketing vocabulary:
Mark Studdock responded:
"Jay, it's very easy to tell everyone to stop using two words, but until you empower them with ...."

Mark, I think you missed the point of my article. I explained that, regardless of our being tired of those ragged and shop-worn terms, they still convey concepts with which we must wrestle, and on which we must ultimately deliver.
I encourage you to read more closely, and to think before hitting "send" in your email program.

-- Jay